the language of accounting

I've come to the conclusion that my accountant sister is brilliant. She is fluent in accounting. A talent I lack. I still have no idea what she and my real accountant are saying. They may as well be speaking Chinese. Even when they say: "let me explain it to you this way" the best I can do is recognize some of the words. Their meaning, I just can't get. "Gross" means: something I would NEVER even consider putting in my shop, or the amount of product I need to buy to get a really great deal. "Net" means: something really cool to hang on the wall in a child's room and load up with stuffed animals, or use in a display of nautical items. "Spreadsheets" is part of an instructional for protecting the floor while painting. "Profit" I get, and I have. I just can't figure out why I'm being punished for it. I told George yesterday "The goal when I opened this place was to not lose money. I didn't know I was going to lose my mind." He thought that was the funniest thing he ever heard. He told me that he told the real accountant and they both laughed. These are 2 wicked men.

I'll stick with my sister. She is kind and caring. She recognizes the blank stare that creeps into my eyes when she's losing me in her "double entries", "columns", "expenses" (I love that word!...oh, I mean I love "expensive". I think that's different.), and "depreciation"...(do I have that?). She's very good with me. She quiets the screaming and calms the frustration. Not that I understand anything any better. She is just so patient with me. I don't mind paying the taxes, I just can't believe that I can run a really successful business, but I cannot understand this language. (I think it goes back to Bev King (the bookkeeper / know it all woman that shared an office with my father and was my mentor, and I use that term loosely, who would sprout horns and a tail between the after school hours of 3 - 5 pm daily when I turned 16....) and unpleasant experiences!)

Thank goodness for my brilliant sister and her translation of accounting... sprinkled with love.